Saturday Music Box – you ought to know

හිතවත් හමීඩ්,

මම ඉන්නේ කාබ්ල් එයාර් පොට් එකේ. සුපුරුදු විදියට ප්ලයිට් එක පරක්කුයි. මේක එයාර් පෝට් එකක්ද එහෙම නැත්නම් ආර්මි කෑම්ප එකක්ද කියලා හිතා ගන්න බැරි තරම් අපි අර පිල්ම් වල දැකලා තියෙන විදියේ පතාක හෙලිකොප්ටර් එහෙට ‍මෙහෙට යනාව. කොහොමත් මුලු රටම ආර්මි කෑම්ප් එකක් විදියට පේන එකේ එයාර් පෝට් එක මෙහෙම නොවුනා නම් තමයි පුදුමේ. උඹ නම් ඔපිස් එකට වෙලා මම දීපු පොටෝ ටික බල බල ඇති. මට 100ට 100ක් විශ්වාසයි මේ වෙනකොටත් උඹ දහ පහලොස් වලතාවක් ත් කෙල්ලන්ගේ පෝටෝස් බලලා.
මේ පාරක් අපිට කතා කරන්න ඉත=රැ වෙලා තිබුණ හොදම දේ තමයි ගිය පාර ඩිනර් එත. ඒ තමයි මුලින්ම මම රෑක කාබුල් වල එළියට ගියේ. ඒ වෙ‍නකොට ඉන්දියානුවක් 30 මරලා සතියක්වත් ගිහින් තිබ්බේක නෑ. ඩනර් එකේ එක අඩුවයි තිබුනේ. ඒ තමයි ගෑනු ළමයි ටික. ඒක ඔයාලට මහ ලොකු කාරණයක් නොවුණත් මම දිගින් දිගටම ප්රශ්න කළා. ඔයාලා හැමෝටම හැම වෙලාවෙම තිබුනේ එක උත්තරයයි. ඒ තමා අපො රටේ එහෙම තමයි කියන එක. හිතා මතාම මම වාද කරන එක නැවැත්තුවා. මම ගෑනු ළමයින්ගෙන් එදා හවස අහද්දී රෑ කෑමට එනව නොද කියලා හැමොම කටපාඩම් කර ගත්ත විදයේ උත්තරයක් දුන්නා. අපිට රෑට එන්න බෑනේ. මේ පාර ආයෙත් ඔය පරණ සිද්ධිය ඇදුනා නේද? මට ඉබේමට කියවුණා උඹලක් එක්ක ඩිනර් වලට ගිහින් වැඩක් නෑ, මොකද ගෑනු පුළුටක් වත් නෑ. එතකොට උඹේ උත්තරේ වුණේ අපේ ආගමේ කියා තිවයන්නේ එහෙම තමයි කියන එක. ගෑනු අයට රෑට එළියට යන එක තහනම්. මොකද්ද උඹ ඔය කියන ආගම? මම දන්න විදියට කිසි ආගමක ඔහොම කතාවක් කියලා නෑ. මේ දැනුත් කුරාණය මගේ බෑග් එකේ තියෙනවා. පුළුවන් නම් ඕක තියෙන් තැන මට පෙන්නපන්. එතකොට උඹ ගොළු වුණා. ටිකකින් මට කියනවා ‍, මේකයි දැන් කාබුල් වල පුදුම විදියට ආරකෂාව ගැන ප්ර්ශ්න කියෙන්නේ ඒ හින්දා තමයි ගෑනු අයට එළියට යන්න බැරි කියාලා. මට ඉබොටම කියවුණා අන්න අන්න, උඹ දැන් ආගමෙන් සම්පූර්ණයෙන්ම වෙන දිශාවකට පනිනාවා. දැනි ආරක්ෂාව ගැන ගතාවක් ගේනවා. පිරිමි සේරටම මහ රෑට එළියේ ඉන්න පුණුවන් නම් ඇයි ගෑනුන්ට විතරක් බැරි. මොකද ගෑනු කන යකෙක් රෑට එළි බහිනවද? දවල්ට මේ රටේ ගෑනු උඹලත් එක්ක හරි හරියට වැඩ කරනවානම්, මහ පාරේ යනවානම් ඇයි කළුවර වැටුනාම විතරක් අනාරක්ෂි වෙන්නෙ?

මහීඩ් උඹ අ‍ායෙත් අන්දුන් කුන්දුන් වුණා. වට පිට බලලා කීවා අපේ සංස්කෘතියේ එහෙම තමයි. මම ඇහුවා කවුද ඔය සංස්කෘතිය හැදුවේ? උඹ නිරුත්තරව බලාගෙන හිටියා. මම හිතුවා මම ම උත්තර දෙන එක හොදයි කියලා. හමීඩ්, උඹ කියනාවම් මේක ආරක්ෂාව ගැන ප්රශ්නයක් කියලා මම එකග වෙන්නම්. මෙකාද ආරක්ෂාව වැදගති. මේ රටේ පිරිමි විදියට රෑට එළියට බහින ගෑනියෙක්ව ආරක්ෂිතව ආපහු ගෙදර යනවන්න බැරිනම් ඒක ගෑනුන්ගේ වරදක් නෙමෙයි. උඹලගේ අවුලක්. උඹලා ඒක පිළිගන්න හින්දා මම එකග වෙන්නම්.
උඹ කියනවානම් මේක සංස්කෘතියේ ප්ර්ශනයක්
කියලා ඒත් මම එකග වෙන්න ලෑස්තියි. මොකද සංස්කෘතියක් කියන්නේ වසර සිය දහස් ගානක් තිස්සේ ආගම, භාෂාව, ජාතාය, ආර්ථිකය, සමාජ කරැණු, සබදතා සහ නීති රීති වගේ කාරණා ගොඩක් එක්ක බිහි වුණු දෙයක්. ඉතින් ඇප්ගනිස්ථානය වගේ විශේෂයෙන්ම පසු ගිය වසර 30 ඇතුළත උඹලා මුහුණ දුන්නු සිදුවීම් එක්ක මම වගේ මිනිහෙකුට තේරුම් ගන්න බැරි සංසිකෘතියක් නිර්මාණය වෙලා. ඒ සංස්කෘතිය ගෑනුන්ව මේ විදියට තේරැම් ගන්නවනම් මම එකගයි.
එැබැයි පුතෝ උඹ කියනවානම් මේ ආගමික කාරණයක් කියලා අන්න මම විරුද්ධ වෙනවා. මොකද ඉතා පැහැදිළිවම ඉස්ලාම් ආගමේ කිසිම තැනක ගැහැණුන්ට රෑට කෑම කන්න එපා කියලවත් රෑට එළියට බහින්න එපා කියලවත් රෑට ගෙදරින් පිට තැනක දී කෑම ගන්න එපා කියලවත් අමුත්තන් සමග කෑම ගන්න එපා කියලවත් සදහන් වෙලා නෑ. නමුත් උඹලා වගේ කොල්ලෝ කියනවා ඒක ආගමිකයි කියලා. උඹලා සංස්කෘතිය හා ආරක්ෂාව වැනි කාරණා ආගම විදියට අර්ථකතනය කරනවා. හරි දැන් ඔයා කියනවනේ මේතමයි ආගම හා සංස්කෘතිය කියලා. එතකොට මේ ආගම වළංගු ඔයාල‍ගේ රටට විතරද? ඉස්ලාම් ආගම තියෙන්නේ ඔයාලගේ රටේ විතරද? ලංකිවේ, පකිසිථානයේ, බංග්ලාදේශයේ හරි ඉරානයේ හරි ඉන්න ඉස්ලාම් ගැහැණු ඉස්ලාම් නෙමෙයිද? හැමදාම මාව රෑ කෑමට එක්කගෙන ගිය මගේ බංග්ලාදේශ මිතුරියෝ පවු කාරයොද? මාත් එක්ක ඩිනර් එකට ගිය මගේ පාකිස්ථාන් මිතුරියෝ ටික වෙනම ආකාරයේ මුස්ලිම් ජාතිකයෝ පිරිසක්ද? කැම්පස් එකේ අපිත් එක්ක එකට වාඩි වෙලා රෑ කෑම කාපු මුස්ලිම් ‍කෙල්ලෝ ටිකට දැන් මෙනවා වෙයිද? හරි ඔය මුකුත් ඕනේ නෑ. බැංකොක් වලදි හා ඇමරිකාවෙදි මාත් එක්ක ඩිනරි එකට හිට ඇප්ගනිස්ථාන් මිතුරියෝ ඔය කියන මුස්ලිම් ආගමේ නෙවෙයිද?
හමීඩ් මචං මේක උඹේ අවුලක් නෙමේ. මේක පිරිමින්ගේ අවුලක්. හැම දේම අපි හදාගෙන ඉන්නේ අපේ ආතල් එක වැඩි කර ගන්න. ගෑනු කියන්නේ අපිට භාණ්ඩයක්. ඒ භාණ්ඩේ පාවිච්චි කරන්න ආගම බැරි නම් වෙන ඕනෙම දෙයක් අපි අපිට ඕනේ විදියට අර්ථ කතනය කරනවා. විශේෂයෙන්ම ආගම කියන කාරණය ගෙනාවම නැවත ප්රශ්න කිරීම සහ අභියොග කිරීම නවතිනවා. හරි දේ කියලා පිළිගන්නවා. අන්න ඒකයි මගේ වැඩමුළුවේ හිටපු කෙල්ලෝ හැමොම කට පාඩමින් කියන්නේ අපිට රෑට එන්න බෑනේ කියලා. උන් බය රෑට නෙමේ. උඹලා වැරදියට අර්තකතනය කරපු ආගමට. පූරුවේ පිනක් තිබිලා කෙල්ලෙක් එක්ක රෑ කෑමකට වාඩි වෙන්න ලැබුණොත් ඒ කෙල්ලව පරිසිසමින් ගෙදර ඇරලවමු. ආයේ හම්බවෙම්.

Making safe ‘sexy’ to combat HIV – Evelyn Harvey

As access the internet and mobiles spreads across the globe, porn travels with it, so that the majority of young men now view some form of erotic material before their first actual experience of sex. What does this mean for the safe sex message, as HIV, condoms and even consent don’t feature heavily in the majority of adult movies?

‘Whether or not we like it, a lot of people do learn about sex from porn. I just finished a book by my colleague Getnet Tadele about sexuality in Desse, Ethiopia, where he found that porn was basically the only form of sex education that young men received,’ commented Krissy Ferris of The Pleasure Project.

The Pleasure Project (www.thepleasureproject.org) championed sexual pleasure at the World AIDS Conference, Vienna, as an overlooked part of the response to HIV. Most new HIV infections are sexually transmitted, and despite advances in treatment, many do not receive the drugs they need to stay well.

Male or female condoms remain the only effective methods of prevention for oral or penetrative sex. However, whether from porn or from their peers, young men are getting an alternative message: that to use a condom will diminish their own or their partners’ pleasure. It’s an insidious message, and it’s not clear how to get past it. But focusing on the raison d’etre of watching porn, sexual pleasure, is one place to start.

“We believe that you can have safer sex if you know how to have good sex. Globally, HIV is primarily a sexually transmitted epidemic. Yet, at international events like the AIDS conference, it is rare to hear sex being discussed. If we are going to really address the HIV epidemic, we will need to address sexuality directly, and promote realistic safer sex options,” states the Pleasure Project’s rationale.

One way to do this is to promote the creation and distribution of ‘safe’ porn. In an analogy, the value of harm reduction approaches to drug use is undisputed, with yet more evidence for the approach presented at AIDS 2010. While porn is nowhere near as damaging, it can become addictive and compulsive, in which case, could a similar approach work?

The Pleasure Project have worked with adult movie directors, actors and actresses to create exciting, sexy films that feature male and female condom use. (We’re talking about scenes where partners enjoy safe, creative, kinky, fun in bed together, not doctors with ‘use a condom, prevent HIV’ banners in the background.)

Of course, the porn industry is vast, and while money is made from it, unsafe sex will prevail. But if more stars and influential directors embraced safe, good, sex, it could have a wide-ranging impact on young people’s first experiences of sex.

“We’ve worked on a film called Modern Loving, which shows couples how to use both male and female condoms (among other sex techniques!). We’ve also worked with the director Anna Span on her films, some of which now use male and female condoms. Kink.com makes BDSM films that not only feature safe sex, but also include pre- and post- shoot interviews with the actors in which they negotiate what will happen in the scene – a great example of how you can obtain consent before a sexual act and still make it sexy,” says Ferris.

Whether you enjoy porn or are revolted by it, it’s a fact of human existence and a powerful influence on millions of young men. It would be a brave international aid agency that decided to fund porn as part of its HIV prevention programs! But perhaps by taking a step away from the clinical, or the ridiculous (abstinence–only), and towards the erotic, safe sex can be made that much more appealing.

Evelyn Harvey
Medical Writer and Editor
Key Correspondent, International HIV/AIDS Alliance                                                                                                                             Email: evelyn@evelynharveymedicalwriting.com

Toon of the Week

“Some grown-ups think we are too young to know. They should know that we are too young t die.”

I was in Dhaka for a regional gathering of young people. There were few discussions among us about various topics and number of topics took my attention because there are related to my life as a young girl. One is about Myths, Beliefs and fact about sexual rights.

As i remember, while we were talking about sexual need, one girl said  “ Men have a biological need to have sex to stay healthy; women therefore are  obliged to have sex when their boyfriends or partners want to, even if they refuse to use a condom.” I was like what the hell !!!
I wanted to give this answer,
Both men and women have biological urges to have sexual intercourse; for example, they can become arouse when they kiss of hug another person. being aroused can mean that a man has an erection and a woman may feel wet between her legs because fluid comes out from her vagina. Even when some one is aroused, they do not have to have sexual intercourse; not having sex will not harm their physical or mental health. This is the same for men and women.
After seeing the movie ‘ Not Yet Rain’ lot of girls pointed out that safe abortions should be legalized. It was a movie about women who have faced the challenge of finding safe care after abortions in Ethiopia.
Very few of them still didn’t want to open up their minds. Some of the reasons they gave were very stupid!! But its not a stupidness of them it’s the stupidness of our society. I wanted to ask them that; If it was you raped and 2 months pregnant how would you feel? Keep them beside, how would YOU feel?
One said;’ easy access to safe abortion services encourages young women to be irresponsible. ‘ Is that true? Even though I believed that every woman should have access to safe abortion i did not have a proper answer for that! But I now understand that this myth is used by the society to stop young women from having access to safe abortion services.
When facing an unplanned pregnancy, women weigh all their options, consider their many obligations, and make the best decision in their particular situation. By choosing not to have a child which I can not care or that would make it very difficult to care for the children I already have, I am actually making a very responsible decision. And having access to safe abortion makes her decision much more respectable. Also, having access to safe abortion services does not make young women want to go out and have sex with many men. But it will strengthen our relationship.
Meanwhile, young boy coming form a little conservative background said that if abortion is done, the “Baby” will turn in to a monster and will hurt us and eat human flesh.  It didn’t make sense at all. If it was true there would be enough monsters to eat us all…
After having very long arguments most of us agreed that abortions should be legalized because, it is a RIGHT and it would prevent many deaths of women specially young women like us who are now forced to have illegal and unsafe abortions or who commit suicide because of not seeing any other option.

My column is over, but i want to give a definition for safe abortion because I saw some disgusting pictures on the internet while i was searching for some pictures to go with this article. Those pictures made me sick!!
Abortion is a process that ends a pregnancy. Safe abortion is a removal of fetus using instruments or medications carried out under supervision of a trained and qualified health care provider in sanitary condition to end a pregnancy. There is NO NO NO killing…

Saturday Music Box – Piano Man

‘Spaced, The Final Frontier: These are the voyages of the Starship Enter-her-slowly-never-mind-the-prize’ Episode 2

Episode 1 – Do you know who Mr. Bojangles is?

Episode 2 – Son, have you ever got stoned?

On our 22^nd day together Mr. Bojangles told me how he acquired his mark of the beast. Those profane half-dozens had stirred grainy memories of Gregory Peck shaving Damien’s head and these turned cartwheels back and forth on the road to Gregory Peck chopping at Damien’s hair with a scissor. Black crows pecking out eyes, howling wolves in the snow and diabolic nannies brandishing carving knives while astride Rottweilers as big as ponies were all mixed in and tumbled around inside me. Mr. Bojangles calmed me down. He buried these memories still breathing and I found myself journeying with a man through a past colourful and ephemeral – a rainbow… and somewhere over and under and through this rainbow the colours drained away and kept coming back with the inevitability of waves breaking and raking golden sand.

Son, have you ever got stoned?

He said this as he dexterously rolled a long thin joint of loco weed with practiced touch. On our eleventh day together he had placed the rusty needle and syringe back exactly where he found it under my bunk. He never took his waking eyes off it. And he slept with his eyes opened with the image of it burned onto his dilated pupils. I am just not ready to live again son. Resurrection expects too much from you when you have been dead this long. Even Christ cried fat painful tears when life coursed through his veins again and he was dead only three days. I have been absent from life for three months. He was the son of a god. I’m just an old man that worships dragons. He drew long and hard on the pencil joint between his fingers. He held it like a cigarette between middle and fore finger. The haze always clouded around him. He always giggled.

The first time he offered it to me he said suck on this son. It’s not mother’s milk. It’s not ambrosia. It’ll make you choke. Good practice for the world outside. Ever felt the world taking you by the throat son, and squeezing out everything inside. This will help you get ready. This will help you cope. Some call it a coward’s way and I don’t care. All I know is it is my way and my way it will always be for just as long as my always is and no longer. 

On the 22^nd day I took the pencil from his outstretched hands and smoked some ganja. I had smoked ganja before and I remember that it made me feel sleepy. It also made me feel sick. Matilda’s carefully manicured toes with their little golden hairs were covered in the lumpy-gooey result. I swore never to smoke anything that would make me do that ever again. I couldn’t afford much more than Matilda. I was used to her. And I didn’t want to ever break in a new fuck. She accepted my apology but never slept with me again, and in three weeks some fucker beat her to a pulp and left her for dead. Now her pimp only uses her for blow jobs. At night. The clients are always as near blind drunk as they have to be to push their dicks into her malformed mouth and they all vomit all over her even before they ejaculate. She would have been with me the night they made her repulsive if I hadn’t smoked a joint and thrown up on her pretty feet.

I was stoned in 1959 son. They stripped me naked trussed me up like a turkey at Christmas and shoved me into a pit of black mud and stoned me near dead. They all had mad red eyes wild beards and double barreled twelve bore shot guns with just enough shells of buckshot to fill at least one barrel each. Their bare feet were blackened as they stood there zealous and ripe with righteousness squelching in the mud on the edge of the pit. When my body was broken and a mess of blood and bone they pulled me up and dragged me to their camp fire. Here the six irons were glowing red in the pernicious heat. They seared 6 6 6 on to my skull and left me whimpering as they drove off in their trucks into a clear star lit Mississippi night.

I was Satan incarnate. I was white and I had fucked the Negro. They were the children of Abraham and I had betrayed their ancestor. Somewhere Christ was being nailed once more to the cross because I had fucked the Negro. I have never fucked anyone since son. The stoning robbed me of my tools. Now I just hold them close. Feel their rhythm infect my body. And dance.

Suddenly two shiny black foots kicked at the bars of our cell. Oi Bojangles man. Home grown just for you. The White Widow sends her love. With this the badge on the chest passes through a block of loco weed and Mr. Bojangles reaches out without getting up and take it. He holds it to his chest and murmurs his reply. Thank her kindly sir. Thank her kindly. Bojangles has never forgotten a kindness. The guard grunts and leaves. The money is good and Mr. Bojangles is a story he will ever tell. His grandchildren will hear of the man their grand-pappy guarded. Mr. Bojangles will live forever.

Are you hearing me son? Mr. Bojangles will live forever. I too will make it so, and his story cannot die with me.

Open your fucking eyes son! Look at me! Look at me you fucking retard! Can you hear me in there? You better hear me son otherwise I will come over there and rip your fucking guts out and feed them to the rats. Do we understand in each other.

Everybody must get stoned son. Mr. Bojangles took the joint from my fingers and watched my reddening eyes as blood vessel engorged after blood vessel. It keeps me alive son. It keeps me alive until I see the dragon again. And that is the only task it is charged with. His eyes never left the needle under my bunk. He smiled. Shall we dance? Without waiting for an answer he stood up and in his hand appeared a cloth bag full of fine white sand. He scooped some up and rained it over the floor of the cell and the bag was gone and Mr. Bojangles with soft shoes on his feet, danced.